The aforementioned rice fields are supposed to be the distinguishing feature, with the resort built on the edge of a fake rice field, with rice farmers and water buffalo working the field every day in a very stylized tableau of rural life in Thailand. Since we lived there, maybe the thrill of seeing rice farmers and fields was lost on us, since the large majority of Thais are rice farmers. Beyoned the field there's supposed to be great views of the surrounding mountains, but in the monsoon those views weren't happening for us, so maybe that's another factor contributing to the letdown. But if you're looking for a truly Disney-fied approach to northern Thailand (which in fact I recommend in this case) check out the Four Seasons Golden Triangle or the Chiang Mai Mandarin Oriental, which are both over the top, in a good way I think. Speaking of Disney in Thailand, about the time of this trip there was front page news everywhere that Disney was going to open up a Magic Kingdom in Isaan, the Northeast of Thailand. As you remember from our Isaan discussion, it's the poorest, most remote part of Thailand, and it's only convenient for Laotians, who of course aren't allowed to leave their country, and certainly wouldn't blow their hard earned cash on Mickey Mouse ears if they could. I couldn't for the life of me figure out what they were thinking, but it turns out it was just a big lie, and the following year they announced they were opening in Hong Kong.

We stayed at the Regent Chiang Mai, now the Four Seasons. It was the only luxury hotel in the city at the time, although the new Mandarin Oriental is our new favorite (in fact we're having our fifth year anniversary celebration there and you're all invited!) One negative is it's pretty far from the city, but other than that it's quite a nice property. Interiors are typical Thai villa style, and the villas are scattered about a very lush property. Not much thought went into the public spaces, but the rooms are more intensely designed than the typical beach villas, and the restaurant is excellent and they have a very nice spa as well. Four Seasons Chiang Mai (8) Room-8, Facilities-8, Service-8, Wow -1, (it's supposed to be the working rice field discussed in the next entry, but the overall colourful jungle feel to the place was more impressive for me).

61. Chiang Mai, Thailand April '01

Another blogging drive by, this time to Chiang Mai. We'll speed by because a) you've already visited it in one of the first entries, and b)the weather was so incredibly bad that we took very few photos. We had just bought a new place in Bangkok, and we were designing it with a mix of contemporary European furniture and Asian antiques, but we needed some functional Asian things to accent the decor as well. And Chiang Mai is by far the best place to go for home decor in Thailand, and probably in Asia. We ended up buying all sorts of kitchen, bathroom etc. pieces and shipping them back, so it was a productive trip, with the added bonus that we got to be indoor most of the time. Here are the only two sightseeing photos we took, which, as usual in Thailand, emphasize the utility cables more than the temples. Bangkok is the world leader in utility over aesthetic design, with dozens of cables draped all over every street and house, but Chiang Mai is pretty bad as well. As for the dainty parasol, I'll have to let Somchai explain that.

These photos show the main plus, which is the villas and their individual pools. At the time of this trip, Banyan Tree and Amanpuri occupied the top rung of Phuket hotels. Amanpuri is head and shoulders above Banyan Tree in most respects, but the individual pools are a nice differentiating factor for the Banyan Tree. The villas are broadly comparable, with both in need of a bit of updating but pretty similar in style and size. One downside of the pool is to maintain privacy you're walled off so there's no view at all, whereas the Amanpuri had ocean views. (Of course there'd be no views even if there were no wall, because the Laguna Complex is just a big flat piece of land). As for location, it depends what you want to do. The Banyan Tree is near the airport, and the idea behind the Laguna is that you'll never leave the complex, so in some ways this is more convenient. Also, it's got a golf course on the property, although there's a better one (at least according to Somchai), nearby which I think is called Blue Canyon. It's a really long drive to anywhere else on the island though, so if you're spending any time at the other beaches, Amanpuri wins again.

60. Phuket, Thailand Mar '01

Had a long weekend in Phuket. Since this is a repeat destination, just a few posts about the hotel, the Banyan Tree. It's located in the north of the island in a complex I don't really like, the Laguna. The Laguna used to be a huge open pit mine, but was transformed into this mega hotel complex about ten or fifteen years ago. The Banyan Tree is the top end resort in the complex, but there are six hotels in all, plus spas and golf courses, each catering to a different price point. I don't remember the exact details, but I do remember there's a book in each hotel room that details exactly what the share capital of the company is, capital expenditures along the way and various rights issues the developers have to further finance the project. I mention this because two things that bug me about the hotel is the overwhelming sense that this is a for profit enterprise, and the overall fakeness of the whole thing. But there are pluses too, so don't give up yet. These photos are of the reception area and a huge lake that forms the centrepiece of the Banyan Tree.

I think Koh Samui is much prettier than Phuket and, notwithstanding recent development, I'm sure it's still more laidback. The main beach, Chaweng, is where all the development is focused. But it still had a nice vibe to it when we were there, especially in the evening, when the beach is converted into a strip of makeshift restaurants, serving decent Thai food and beer by candle light while you hang out on beach blankets and listen to lounge music. And the rest of the island is much less developed and more naturally scenic. With the arrival of some new and better hotels, I'd now recommend it over Phuket unless you're really into the club/bar scene.

Apart from the gnomes, the other big problem with the hotel was its bigness. The villas were priced similarly to the top Thai resorts, but one drawback here is the villas are attached to a much bigger and cheaper hotel. So the hotel food and service can't really measure up to the smaller boutique properties who they're competing with, at least in price. Tongsai Bay (5) Room: 6, Facilities: 4, Service: 2, Wow: 0.

We stayed at Tongsai Bay Resort, which was the only high-end hotel at the time. (Now there are quite a few boutique hotels here, which I think fit much better with the overall laid back feel of Samui). Tongsai is ok, but no better. There are a few villas, one of which is pictured here. They are huge, with an enormous outdoor space overlooking the bay, complete with bathtub, bed, and bar (Somchai the bartender not included). So the outside space gets two thumbs up. If you look closely at the bar area photo though, you'll see three frog statuettes. No big deal in the open deck area, but inside, the statuette theme is carried out to a horrible extreme. There were over 200 statues of frogs, garden gnomes, assorted animals etc. They were everywhere, row upon row, and were really offputting. There were also lots of plastic trees inside, which is pretty inexplicable in the tropics (or anywhere, really).

Koh Samui is the second largest island in Thailand (after Phuket) and is in the process of being Phuketicized. It didn't have any roads until the 1970's, and remained difficult to get to, but the airport put Samui firmly on the tourist map. When we were there Samui was still quite underdeveloped relative to the other Thai beach resorts, but I would think by now it's pretty indistinguishable. The airport, where these photos were taken, is great, very laid back with plenty of open space for tourists to catch some last minute sun before heading home.

57. Koh Samui, Thailand Sept '00

I know you're all diligently tracking my every entry, wondering, when will he screw up? Well, you got me. As you're no doubt aware, the New Zealand trip was in October, so why is it being followed by a Koh Samui trip in September? The long answer has to do with the miracle of time travel, but the short answer is I temporarily lost the Samui photos, but they resurfaced just as the New Zealand part of the blog was finished and I'm not smart enough to figure out if there's a way to slot Samui in chronologically, so it will remain out of order forever, and when some aliens descend on earth millions of years from now and are trying to figure out our civilization, this blog will cause them to question whether September or October comes first in our calendars, and throw all their historical research in doubt forever. Sorry about that.

The hotel has its own boat, which we took out for a day around Pang Nga Bay. The island of Phuket is hilly but not interestingly so, and most of it is covered with roads and shopping malls. But its coastline is still pretty in many places, and nearby Pang Nga Bay is quite a showstopper. All these rocky protrusions give the place an otherworldly feel to it, and makes for a great day out on a boat. There are several Muslim communities that live on the sea, with their villages on stilts protruding from the island. I'm going to end the Phuket discussion with the picture of Somchai in the ocean, who is either enjoying himself or about to drown and signaling for help.

Some more photos of Amanpuri. As mentioned above, I think we were the only people using the pool the whole time, and its a pretty cool pool too. There's a small beach down below the hotel, but it's not very interesting and there are much nicer ones elsewhere on the island. Also, since I'm beginning to sound like I work for Aman, I'd also point out that there restaurant isn't very interesting and the menu somewhat uninspired. But that's about all the criticism I can muster.

After that pretty negative introduction, you may be surprised that we returned in a couple weeks for our second anniversary. So obviously we had a great time during our first trip, we just didn't spend much time in Patong, and you shouldn't either. One easy way to avoid that is to stay at one of the many far flung hotels. We stayed at the Amanpuri, the grande dame of Phuket hotels. It's reasonably close to Patong geographically, but a world apart in other ways. And the ride from Patong to the hotel is about a half hour, on very windy hilly streets in the back of a pickup truck, Phuket's version of a taxi. That will naturally curb any desire you might have to overindulge, or you'll regret it at some point on your ride home.

Amanpuri was I believe the first Aman, which is far and away our favorite hotel chain, as you'll find out over time. It's also the first of the superluxe hotels in Phuket, although it now has some competition for that market from Banyan Tree and Trisara. In my opinion Amanpuri still winds hands down, but since we've stayed at all the others, I'll save my knocks against them for future entries. Amanpuri is about 20 villas, all scattered among the jungle overlooking the ocean. There's a communal pool and restaurant, but in general the point of an Aman is to stay away from other people, so you rarely bump into anyone. That's why it's the favored destination for celebrities, and why you'll usually be sharing the hotel with at least one famous person, but you'll also never see them.

The Aman villa is definitely spacious and impeccably decorated, but it's very understated bordering on plain. They don't compete on glitz, but on providing as much privacy as you want, and fantastic service. As a chain, they've perfected the art of service. Lots of high end hotels have armies of staff who mill about with silly jobs like bath concierge. But here staff is largely invisible until you might want something and then it appears. They're also very relaxed and friendly, not stiff and formal or too subservient, just nice, the way you want it to be on a beach holiday.

37. Phuket, Thailand Aug-Sept '99

The title is a bit misleading, as I didn't actually spend two months in Phuket. Rather my first and second trips there took place in rapid succession, so I'm just grouping them into one entry. The first trip took place in August, and we went with our friend Molly and stayed at some hotel on Patong Beach, which is Phuket's party central. The second trip was a couple weeks later in September, where we stayed at the opposite end of Phuket's relatively limited spectrum at the Amanpuri.

Phuket is considered by most Asians as their premier holiday destination. I arrived at that conclusion completely unscientifically, but I have enough anecdotal evidence to back that up. It's a unique (for Asia) package of cheap and good food, cheap golf, great beaches and cheap sex that makes it almost impossible to have a bad time. Many Westerners also find the place irresistible, and many families, mostly Europeans come back every year for an affordable and easygoing family vacation. For me, it's probably the place I've gone more than anywhere else for a holiday, but that doesn't translate into any sort of high ranking on my favorite places list. It's fine for an easy weekend, but I could never spend longer than that there. It's got some really nice hotels, which for me is the main draw, but the island itself is fairly ugly, with a pretty plain interior and way too overdeveloped. The party scene is crazy, and the area around Patong Beach seems to be competing with Bangkok's Patpong as the sleaziest place on earth. Not sleazy dangerous at all, just supremely tacky. Everyone should go once to see thousands of drunken tourists flop about the market, getting tattoos, buying t shirts, eating terrible fast food, then heading to the hundreds of strip joints and other sex places. If you like transvestites, this is the place for you, and you can be certain that if any woman talks to you in a bar, she's a prostitute or a man. But once you get the Patong Beach scene out of your system, focus on the rest of the island. Again, I think it comes up short on natural beauty, but it's got some great hotels, good restaurants, endless beaches and of course the always hospitable Thai people.

The following morning, checked out of the Royal Princess with a heavy heart, and headed for one last ruin, at Phimai. Built around the same time as Panom Rung, this was more of a community temple rather than a place for special ceremonies like Panom Rung. It's built on a flat plain so lacks the drama of a hilltop setting, but it makes up for it in the intricate carvings that cover almost all the surfaces of the temple. The carvings are of various Hindu mythological stories, with some later Buddhist imagery, and now I'm going to tell you the story behind each of the carvings...Not!

Downhill from Phnom Rung lies this neglected pile of ruins called Muang Tam. It's only about a fifteen minute walk, although it felt like fifteen hours in the steaminess of an Isaan summer. It probably served as the residence of the Khmer governor among other things. We had the place to ourselves, so it was a fun place to poke around for an hour. Afterwards, we drove into the provincial capital of Khorat for an overnight stay at the Royal Princess Hotel. (Aren't all princesses royal?) Well, this hotel was not a princess, just a standard business hotel, but it did have the key virtue of being the only proper hotel in Khorat. Khorat is a big, busy, featureless city like most Thai provincial capitals. It boomed as the main airbase for the American air force during the Vietnam base. It does have one historical claim to fame, as the home of Khunying Mo. She was the wife of the local governor, who was in Bangkok at the time of an invasion by a Lao army in 1826. This must have surprised everyone since after thousands of years of fighting among the Thais, Cambodians and Burmese, I think this is the one and only time the Lao sprang into action. The Lao captured Khorat, but quickthinking Khunying Mo entertained the invaders, got them drunk, and had them all killed while they were sleeping it off. So our sightseeing consisted of visiting the monument to her then getting some Isaan food at the night market.

A couple of photos from the top of the complex, showing the main temple building which is supposed to be Mt. Meru, where the Hindu gods live. One interesting feature of this temple is there are fifteen doorways (where you see some monks in the photo above) and on Songkran, the Thai new year celebration I talked about hundreds of posts ago so I'm sure you remember, the sun shines straight through the all fifteen doors at sunrise.

First stop after lunch was the Cambodian (or Khmer) temple of Phanom Rung. For those of you who have been to Cambodia's Angkor Wat, the similarities are pretty obvious, and for those of you who haven't, watch this space. It's the most dramatic site in Thailand, with a long processional walkway, climbing up an imposing staircase to the temple complex itself. It was built as a part fort, part Hindu temple, since Cambodia (and Thailand) were originally Hindu before converting to Buddhism about a thousand years ago. It's part fort because it formed part of the military network Cambodia built when it occupied Laos and much of Thailand in the 11th and 12th centuries. When the Thais beat back the Cambodians to their present borders, most traces of Cambodian culture disappeared in Thailand, except this series of ruined temple forts.

36. Isaan, Thailand, July '99

Staying on the domestic front, took a weekend driving trip to Isaan, the name for the Northeast region of Thailand. Thailand has four regions, each quite distinct in terms of history, language, and food. Bangkok, Ayudhaya and everything generally within driving distance from Bangkok is central, and is generally considered proper Thailand. Lanna, the North, which we've already visited earlier in the blog, speaks a different dialect but is still considered completely Thai. Also the women are famous as the most beautiful in Thailand if you're into this sort of thing. Of course, most importantly, it's also where Somchai is from. The South is an "eclectic" region, containing most of Thailand's most famous beach resorts, such as the already discussed Krabi and soon to be discussed Phuket. It also contains all of Thailand's civil war, bombings etc, hence the eclectic label. It's mostly Muslim, and many of the people speak Malay rather than Thai. Lastly, there's Isaan, which is a minefield to talk about. It's indisputably the poorest part of Thailand, as it's densely populated, rice farming is really the only occupation, but it's usually bone dry and a desert in parts, not a good combination. Most of Bangkok's prostitutes (male and female) come from Isaan, and a lot of the region survives on money sent back by Isaan natives working in Bangkok. Their language is very close to Thai, and in fact is basically Lao (obviously the language of neighboring Laos). The whole Laos thing is another minefield, since in Thais consider it just a poor version of Thailand. So Thais from outside Isaan make fun of Laos all the time for being poor and backward (and worse) but they're also poking fun at Isaan indirectly.

With that as a background, we went off to explore the region, which confusingly, as you'll soon see, meant looking at Cambodian temples. But we started the trip off with one thing all Thais agree on: Isaan food is the spiciest! Pictured here is Somchai playing with his whole fish before he eats everything but the bones, and a big bowl of somtam, basically thousands of fiery chilies in a bowl separated by some slivers of sour unripe papaya. It's his favorite dish, and what he misses most in Sydney.

If you've done as instructed and seen the floating market in the early morning, you've got the problem of what to do with the rest of your day. There are really two options, keep going west to Kanchanaburi, home of the famous Bridge over the River Kwai, or south to Nakhon Pathom. I've been to Kanchanaburi a couple of times, pleasant though not that interesting so on balance I don't think it's worth the extra drive. Nakhon Pathom has the advantage of being on the way back to Bangkok, so it's not out of the way. It's the largest temple in Thailand, and supposedly the tallest stupa (the big gold thing in the photo) in the world. It was built where Buddha, after he had walked all over Thailand, came to rest. Of course since Buddha never actually came to Thailand it doesn't quite square with reality, but I've given up long ago trying to square religion with facts. A temple has been here for about a thousand years, during which time it's been abandoned to the jungle several times, then re-discovered and enlarged. Its most recent rediscovery was by King Rama IV, when he came upon the ruin while he was training as a monk around 1850. He had it repaired and enlarged, and the current version includes the previous versions inside its massive gold stupa. Apart from its religious significance, its main claim to tourist attention is its size. So you can drive there, admire its bigness, and move on.

Oops! Just as I finished this post, I saw Dad and possibly Pomme in the corner of the last photo, so I guess Somchai was right and these photos did come from their visit. So they shouldn't be in the blog, and please strike the last few posts from your memories, thanks.